Sweet Dreams
by d1sT0rT3D-L0v3
Summary: Miroku has always been worried about his Kazaana. But when the day comes for him to face his fears, can he do it? And why does everything seem so surreal?
1. Nightly Routine

Ch. 1:

me: this is my first Miroku/Sango fanfic! I really need your opinions and advice!

Kikyo: X.X

me: eeek, oh yeah, I almost forgot:

Disclaimer: _I do not own InuYasha, and I don't own the song "Sweet Dreams". _

me: yeah, that's where I got the title from. It's a song lyric.

Kikyo: ::sings the song off-key:: ::dogs start howling::

* * *

The sun was setting across the feudal era. A dark haired girl with ponytail and a small cat sat outside the small wooden hut, listening to the sounds of the evening. She could hear the birds chirping, the squirrels running across the leaves, and water from the stream nearby drifting slowly downstream. It was all quite pleasant and comfortable.

Of course, all those nice sounds couldn't block out the deafening argument that was coming from inside.

"Why d'ya have to be such a pervert, Miroku?!" InuYasha yelled, his voice reverberating around the hut.

"It wasn't me! I swear, my hand must have a will of its own or something...its quite amazing, once you think about it." A slightly calmer male voice answered. There was a hint of laughter in the houshi's voice, which was only making InuYasha madder.

"InuYasha, just calm down. It's not like Miroku hasn't pulled this before..." Kagome's high voice reached Sango's ears, and the exterminator instantly knew the problem. Miroku had tried to grope Kagome again, and InuYasha had gotten infuriated with him...again. Sango sighed deeply and got up. Oh yes, this was going to be a peaceful night. She entered the room slowly, and Kagome rushed over to her.

"Sango-chan...they're fighting again..." Kagome stated the obvious. Little Shippo-chan was hiding in the corner, half covered by Kagome's backpack, Sango noticed. It seemed he didn't want to get in the middle of this madness. Well, who could blame him? Once you thought about it, it was actually pretty funny. Sango laughed in spite of herself.

"Just keep your hands off Kagome, you bastard!!"

"Don't deny it, InuYasha...you're in love."

"I am not! What the hell do you know??"

Kagome sighed, putting her head in her hands. "This might take a while, Sango-chan."

"Shall we stop them?"

"How?"

"Well...I would throw Hiraikotsu, but it might ruin the place." Sango thought aloud.

"True..." Kagome watched InuYasha's face turn red as he yelled at the hentai houshi. "You know, I can think of only one way to solve this problem..." She looked at Sango. "You might want to run..." Kagome walked closer to InuYasha. "Look, InuYasha...can you please stop fighting with Miroku? Please?"

"Like hell I will!" InuYasha growled. Kagome's face turned red.

"InuYasha...sit boy!"

As usual, the hanyou plummeted to the wooden floor, smashing a hole in it. Miroku looked shocked.

"There goes our nice sleeping quaters..." the monk sighed. Sango had to bite her lip; this was all just too funny.

"Ohh...he went through the floor??" Kagome shrieked. "InuYasha, are you all right?" Shippo peeked out from under Kagome's pack. Upon seeing the look on InuYasha's face, he burrowed back in, much deeper this time. Shippo knew that look... and he didn't like it at all.

"Heh...do I LOOK like I'm all right, wench?! What the hell did you do that for??"

"Probably to make you be quiet, I'd expect." Miroku noted smugly. InuYasha looked ready to kill.

"I'm still not finished talking with you, Miroku!" InuYasha stood up unsteadily, wincing.

"InuYasha, please just forget about it... Miroku just likes to grope every pretty girl he sees..." Kagome said offhandedly. The monk nodded happily.

"Very true, InuYasha." Miroku said.

"Feh, pretty girl? He'll grope any wench he can get his dirty hands on!"

"_Excuse me?!" _Kagome shrieked. "InuYasha, that's so rude!"

"I can't help that its true!" InuYasha yelled. Kagome looked down, her face crimson, and her eyes shining. InuYasha panicked; he did NOT like to see women cry.

"I'm sorry, okay?!" He muttered. Kagome's head was still bent down, and her shoulders were shaking. Sango came up behind Kagome and put her hand on her shoulder.

"Kagome-chan, it's ok..." Sango murmered, shooting a murderous glare at InuYasha, who looked bewildered.

"I didn't mean to make her cry!! I didn't mean it Kagome, really..." InuYasha exclaimed. Kagome shook some more, and then burst out laughing.

"She...wasn't crying?" Miroku asked in shock. Sango grinned, understanding what the miko had done. Kagome had wanted to get her sympathy from InuYasha, for calling her a wench.

"I-I'm sorry InuYasha...it was just the look on your face when.... oh god that was funny..." Kagome said. She giggled a little more, then stood up. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry.... now let's just please go to bed, please?"

".......fine..." InuYasha mumbled. He was clearly embarrassed about being played for a fool. The hanyou stomped outside, to sleep on the roof, as usual. Kagome watched him go.

"D'ya think he's really mad?" She asked quietly. Sango and Miroku shook their heads.

"Nah," Sango replied. "Just a little annoyed I guess." Kagome looked like she felt better, and she spread out the blankets for the other three. Sango chose the blanket farthest away from Miroku, who seemed to be looking for some mayhem to cause. Kagome moved her blanket closer to Sango's.

"Shippo, you can sleep by Miroku..." Kagome said, causing Miroku to make a tiny noise of disappointment. The kitsune looked annoyed, but he was too sleepy to argue. Within ten minutes, Shippo and Kagome were asleep.

* * *

InuYasha looked up at the millions of stars in the sky. He wanted to go back down and apologize to Kagome for being so snappy, but it was too late for that. He didn't want to look desperate, after all.

"I wonder if she's really mad..." InuYasha thought sleepily. The stars and the cool air were too much for him, and he quickly gave in to sleep.

* * *

"Houshi-sama, are you asleep?" Sango asked.

"Mmmm...not yet. Why? Anything wrong, Sango?"

"No...just checking." Sango replied, a faint smile on her face.

"Are you worried about me?" Miroku asked slyly. Sango sat up quickly.

"No! Of course not!" She said indignantly.

"Oh Sango...would it be so hard to say something nice once in a while? Like, 'sweet dreams' or, 'see you in the morning'? Must we always be so stubborn?"

Sango sighed and lay back down on her pillow. He did have a point...but she wouldn't let him know that... "Goodnight, Houshi-sama."

Miroku smiled. "'Night, Sango. Sweet dreams."

me: yeah...so this is my first Miroku/Sango. I usually only do Inu/Kag fics, but hey. Might as well try, ne?

* * *

Kikyo: ::is still singing::

me: ::begins to hand out earplugs:: well, please read and review!


	2. Fake Amnesia

* * *

Ch. 2

me: hi. Okay, real quick announcement, here. I put that Miroku has his Kazaana in his right hand, because that's what they say in the second movie. If it's on his left hand, I'm sorry; I just went by the movie. And I'm sorry if Kaede's medical diagnosis sounds fake; I have no clue if that is something a doctor would say or not... sorry! sweatdrop Oh, btw, thanks everyone who reviewed!!

Kikyo: MOO!

me: um.......im just going to not deal with that right now... O.o also, this chapter is pretty short. Sorry!

* * *

"H-Houshi-sama? Oh god, Miroku, are you all right?" Sango's voice...usually so confident and self-assuring was now panicked and nervous. Miroku felt the stabbing pains in his right hand, and knew instantly what must have happened. The Kazaana was giving him trouble, once again. The morning sunlight hit his eyelids, and he could hear people talking. What was happening? Who had they fought? There was too much to comprehend at once.

_But wait.... how could all of this have happened between tonight and this morning? Just last night, I was talking to Sango, and everything was fine! My hand was perfectly normal. We haven't fought any demons since then...have we? _Slowly, Miroku opened one of his dark eyes. It wasn't the same hut as yesterday...in fact, it looked a lot like Kaede's cottage, which made _no _sense at all! The hole from yesterday's "sit" was missing, and Kagome had only two arrows left; last night she had seven. InuYasha's arm was covered in blood, and Sango had a gash in her leg. This didn't make any sense.

"Miroku...please lay down, please?" Sango whispered, dampening a cloth and placing it over the houshi's head. The pain in his arm was worsening, and he was sweating copiously. Yet he felt cold...so cold... what on earth had they fought?

"God Miroku, I told you not to try to be a hero!" InuYasha said angrily. Miroku tilted his head toward the hanyou, having absolutely no clue what he was referring to. "We were doing fine, dammit! The wasps wouldn't have caused that much damage, you idiot!" .

_Ah. The wasps. Naraku's poisonous wasps were the cause of the horrible pain. _Miroku had sucked in these said wasps many times before; the poison was always stopped before it was too late. But it had never felt this bad, never! But then again, Kaede had always cured the poison before it had spread too far... would she be able to cure him this time? As if on cue, Kaede walked in, a vial of red liquid in her wrinkled hand.

"Ah, Miroku. I see you're conscious." Kaede knelt down beside him and held the vial up to his eyes. "This is the only thing that could possibly cure you, so drink up." She said, a false twinkle in her eyes. Miroku wasn't fooled.

"Kaede-sama, why does this feel so much more serious then before?" The monk asked quietly. His throat felt dry and scratchy, and he took the vial and downed it in one gulp.

"Well, I won't lie to you, Miroku. It seems that the poison has spread faster than normal. It's dangerously close to your vital organs, and there's nothing we can do for you if the poison reaches your heart. Lucky for you, as long as the red potion works, you won't have to worry about that."

"But what if it doesn't work?" Kagome whispered, eyeing Miroku nervously. Kaede sighed and stood up.

"There is a one in three chance that the potion will be too late to stop the spread. If it isn't strong or fast enough, then Miroku won't stand a chance." Kaede said wearily. At her words, Sango gasped and tears filled her eyes. Even InuYasha looked worried.

"But...it will work, right Kaede-sama? Right?" Sango pleaded urgently. Kaede shook her head.

"It's pretty much luck from here, Sango." The aged miko said sadly. "I'll leave you four alone. Shippo, come with me." The tiny fox demon that had been hovering in the corner, looking apprehensively at Miroku the whole time, followed Kaede out the hut.

"W-when did we fight the demons?" Miroku asked softly.

"Yesterday, you moron." InuYasha said, trying and failing to be his usual cocky self.

"What? Yesterday?" Miroku asked, confused. "Yesterday we were traveling to that hut just north of Kaede-sama's village! We hadn't fought demons for almost three days!"

"That poison must be making you delusional," InuYasha muttered, scornfully. "Yesterday, we fought Kagura. Two days before, we saved the village with all the demons. Don't you remember?"

"No...no I don't.." Miroku said. Sango and Kagome looked worried, and Sango rushed to

re-dampen the cloth on Miroku's forehead.

"It's ok, Houshi-sama.." Sango murmured. "We'll take care of you. Don't wor-" Before she could finish her sentence, Sango was interrupted by a certain someone's hand.

-SLAP-

"I was _trying _to take care of you, you stupid pervert!" Sango screeched, her eyes narrowed and angry. Miroku rubbed the red mark on his face.

"I am sorry Sango. It was too good an opportunity to miss..." he replied, happily. He didn't feel that he had any need to worry; he had always recovered from the wasps before, and this time would be no exception.

"God Miroku. Here I was feeling sorry for you, and then you go pull a stunt like that!" InuYasha yelled. Miroku still wore his content smile...

...which, ten seconds later, disappeared from his face. He felt like someone was slashing open his stomach, and he gasped for air. In an instant, Sango was by his side, and Kagome had run off to fetch Kaede.

"Miroku? Miroku, what's wrong? Miroku, you better not be playing a trick on me, seriously." Sango felt his forehead, which was hot, in spite of the cool cloth. InuYasha observed from above her.

"Miroku! What happened?" Kaede asked. The monk couldn't speak; he gave a hacking cough, and blood splattered onto the white sheet that was half covering him.

"Oh god..." Kagome cried, burying her face into InuYasha's sleeve. Sango watched in horror as Miroku coughed more, then lay back onto the floor. His face was white, and beads of sweat inched down his forehead. He gasped for air again, then lay back down. Kaede forced him to consume more of the red liquid, but it didn't seem to be helping. He was shaking violently, and his face was becoming whiter by the second. He shook some more, and then...

..then the shaking stopped. The monk fell back upon the floor, and moved no more. Kagome lifted her head from InuYasha's sleeve and stared at his still figure. Sango leaned toward Kaede.

"Did he pass out, Kaede-sama?" Sango asked, almost hopefully. Passing out was okay, passing out wasn't...death. Kaede put her hand to his wrist, then to his forehead. She seemed unable to speak for a while, during which Kagome moaned and begin to cry again. InuYasha was staring at Kaede intently. But Sango couldn't remove her eyes from Miroku. She didn't like the way he looked, all white and still.

"I'm sorry, Sango." Kaede said, wiping her eyes with a white sleeve. "He's dead."


	3. Unanswered Questions

Ch. 3

me: ok...after I killed Miroku, a lot of people were upset, I noticed...

Kikyo: cough understatement of the century cough

me: so, xgirl66, please don't devour my liver...devour Kikyo's instead!! O.o and to the rest of the Miroku fangirls, im sorry!

* * *

Kaede's hut was a depressing sight. Kagome was sobbing in InuYasha's arms. InuYasha's eyes were wide and surprised at Kaede's diagnosis. But Sango...Sango was staring at Miroku, as though she were made of stone. Kaede stood heavily and walked toward the door.

"I think you all need some time alone." She said quietly, walking out of the room. Sango's eyes were still glued to Miroku.

"I hit him." She whispered, her eyes filling with tears.

"Wh-what, Sango-chan?" Kagome choked out, her eyes red from crying.

"Just before he died. I slapped him and called him a pervert. That was the last thing I said to him. He died before I could tell him that I..." Sango stopped, as though suddenly realizing Kagome and InuYasha were present. It wouldn't do to have an emotional breakdown in front of them.

"Why did this have to happen?" Kagome cried, kneeling beside the houshi. It was so strange, to see him like this, without the firey attitude he usually portrayed. Kagome stared at him for a moment longer, then stood up, wiping her eyes. "Do you want a moment alone, Sango-chan?"

"Oh...yes, please." Sango replied. She watched to make sure Kagome and InuYasha were gone, then she turned back to Miroku. She felt this terrible pain inside at the thought of Miroku never coming back. It was as though any moment, she would feel his hand where it was not welcome. It was all a joke, he was just doing it to get her closer to him, so he could pull his usual tricks.

"Come on, Miroku." Sango muttered. "You can stop now, okay?" A tear slipped from her eye and onto his cheek. "Great. I'm crying now, Miroku. Just wake up, okay? This isn't funny."

The monk didn't stir. Sango waited, her eyes still overflowing with tears. She moved a lock of his black hair out of his eyes, and stared at him longingly.

Miroku felt quite strange...this feeling, there were no words to describe it. It was like...floating, almost. Yet he couldn't open his eyes, which made no sense at all. He was just floating...higher, and higher. He didn't know what was happening. Was he dead? Was he going to heaven? The thought comforted him. It was as though he was four again, sitting on his dad's lap.

* * *

_"Dad? What's a curse?" A young, black haired boy asked. He was perched on his dad's knee, wearing the traditional clothes of a Buddhist monk. The boy stared at his right hand, which was draped in violet cloth. _

_ "You're too young to understand such things, Miroku." The older man said, smiling at his son. He himself was also wearing traditional clothing, with a cloth over his hand._

_ "No I'm not!" Little Miroku said, indignantly. "Mushin said that some guy named Raraku gave it to us!"_

_ "It's Naraku, with an 'N'." His dad corrected. "And for once, Mushin is right."_

_ "Then how come Mushin doesn't have one?" Miroku asked. "That's not fair, that we have to and he doesn't!" _

_ "It's not a matter of what's fair and what's not." The older man said wearily. "We have this because of something your grandfather did, a while back."_

_ "Grandpa did something to Naraku?"_

_ "In a manner of speaking, yes."_

_ "But I never did anything to that guy! How come I'm cursed, too?" Miroku cried. This was very confusing. _

_ "It doesn't matter. Naraku just chose to make it that way."_

_ "Well, Naraku is stupid." Miroku said stubbornly. "When I grow up, I'm gonna fight him!" _

_ His dad chuckled. "I'm sure you will, Miroku. If you win, I will be very pleased."_

_ "I will win, dad. I betcha I'm stronger than him!" Miroku said, his eyes flaming. "I'll win, and get rid of this stupid hole! Just you wait and see, dad! Just wait and see..."_

* * *

Miroku smiled at the memory. How naive, he had been at the age of four. He had truly though that Naraku was going to be weak and cowardly. Well, he had at least gotten the cowardly part right. As Miroku reflected on his life, a white flash passed in front of his closed eyes, causing them to fly open. What he saw almost made him faint.

He was looking at...himself and Sango! He was lying on the floor, with a blood splattered cloth over him. Sango was sitting next to him, moving his hair out of his eyes. Where was he?

_Oh god... that's me.. I'm dead! _Miroku thought, horrified. He watched as Sango continued to cry over his dead body. This wasn't right; he was still here! He needed to show her, somehow...

"Sango!" Miroku yelled loudly. "I'm still alive! Sango!" He looked at her anxiously, checking for the signs that she had heard him. There were none. He floated closer to her, waving his hand in front of her face. Still nothing.

_Am I a ghost? _Miroku thought. Sango stood abruptly, startling Miroku. She wiped her eyes and cleared her throat. As soon as she left the room, Miroku was slammed with another memory.

* * *

_"Dad! Dad!" The young Miroku rushed outside. It was like a tornado had hit; a strong wind was blowing everything away...and his dad was inside it. "Dad! What are you doing?" He could hear his dad yelling in pain and fear. _

_ "Miroku! Get away from there!" Mushin's voice rose above the roaring wind. Miroku turned to look at the plump man, then turned back to his dad, who was being sucked into his own Wind Tunnel, or so it seemed. _

_ "Dad!!" Miroku screamed. His dad was still yelling, his face contorted in pain. Miroku ran toward the wind, but Mushin's strong arms caught him and pulled him away._

_ "No, Miroku! You mustn't be sucked in!" _

_ "Let me go!! Why aren't you helping Dad?! He needs help! He needs help!!" Miroku screamed, tears running down his face. He violently broke away from Mushin, but it was too late. With one last gust of wind, his dad disappeared into the void. Miroku rushed into the hole the wind had made, searching for his father. _

_ "Dad? Dad? Dad, where are you?" Miroku cried, his voice squeaking with fear. Finding no trace of his father, the young boy fell to his knees and sobbed. His dad had left him, without any warning. Just as his mother had. _

_ "I didn't even get to say good-bye..." Miroku sobbed. Mushin looked at the small boy sadly, then picked him up and carried him into the house. _

* * *

" I haven't thought about that in years..." Miroku said softly. If he was dead, then maybe he would see his mother and father in heaven. Finally be reunited after all these hard years.. He floated aimlessly toward the door, which Sango, Kagome and InuYasha passed through. It was an odd feeling, to have your friends pass through you.

"I can't believe he's dead." InuYasha said, staring at the body.

"I didn't even get to say good-bye..." Sango murmured softly. Miroku stared at the demon slayer.

Kagome was quiet. It was though she was numb. Miroku looked into her eyes, which were red-rimmed. She sniffed and moved closer to InuYasha.

"I already miss him so much..." Sango whispered. Kagome nodded her agreement, and even InuYasha gave the tiniest of nods.

"Sango...." Kagome said, turning to her friend. "This is totally out of line, I know. But...I've always wondered....did you love him? I mean, I know he loved you, but did you love him?"

Miroku blinked when he heard Kagome ask the question. He floated closer, wanting to hear every word of her response. She looked so helpless, her face tear stained.

"Did I...love him?" Sango repeated. "Well..."

* * *

me: ah. I love cliffies. Oh, plus, the part where Miroku sees his dad get sucked up, I know that was an episode, but I don't tape them, so I didn't know the dialogue. Therefore, I made stuff up. Sorry!

Kikyo: ::is running from xgirl66::


	4. Lost and Found

Ch. 4

me: Hello!

Kikyo: ::grumbles:: I'm DEAD, okay? I don't have a liver if I'm dead!!

me: O.o okay then...

* * *

"Did I love Miroku?" Sango repeated. Kagome looked anxious for her answer, and even InuYasha stopped twitching to stare at Sango. Miroku bit his lip nervously, and fidgeted with his robe.

"No." Sango spoke abruptly, standing up. "I didn't. Sorry Kagome. I know you were expecting me to say yes." She turned on her heel and left the room. Kagome sighed.

"I was almost positive..." She said sadly.

"I know." InuYasha replied, looking at Miroku. The hanyou lifted the white sheet until it fully covered the houshi, then left the room with Kagome.

"She didn't...love me?" Miroku spoke quietly. All those times he had hit on other girls...she had always gotten jealous. Didn't that mean something? He floated through the door, and left Kaede's hut. He didn't want to be around his own dead body. The monk slowly drifted toward Kagome's well. There was something about that well, something calming. And he really needed to be calmed right now...

* * *

Sango wandered aimlessly around Kaede's village. She really needed to get out of the hut, and be away from InuYasha and Kagome's interrogations...and she needed to get away from the body, as well.

"Miroku hasn't even been dead for twenty minutes, and already Kagome asks me that!" Sango muttered. "She has no sensitivity whatsoever...." She sighed. "I need a place to sit down." Sango made her way toward the Bone-Eater's Well, where she sat down heavily on the grass.

Miroku was startled to see the demon exterminator coming toward him. He quickly looked for a place to hide...that is, until he remembered he was dead. Sighing heavily, the monk perched on the edge of the well, falling right through it.

"This is getting quite annoying..." Miroku stated angrily. So, he couldn't even sit? What was the point of seeing all this? Why didn't he just die already? Finally, Miroku satisfied himself by hovering by Sango. He watched her carefully. She sniffed and wiped her eyes with her green sleeve.

"Well, Kagome...so what if I did love him?" Sango muttered. "Why should I tell you and InuYasha? It's not like it matters anymore, anyway...there's nothing I can do about it...I doubt he even loved me back! He hit on other girls and he's never asked me to bear his child... even though he's asked every other woman on the face of the earth..."

"You loved me?" Miroku asked incredulously. She didn't answer him, of course, but she shivered slightly and lay her head on her knees. Miroku was about to go comfort her, or try to anyways, when-

* * *

_"Dad? Why don't I have a Mom?" Miroku asked, staring up at his father expectantly. The man sighed, and knelt in front of his son._

_ "Miroku...your mother died while giving birth to you. She didn't mean to leave us, but it was her time to go." His father said wearily. Thinking of his dead wife was the last thing he wanted to do._

_ "She could have stayed if she wanted to." Miroku said stubbornly. "No one just leaves like that, no one!"_

_ "She didn't have a choice. If she did, I'm positive she would have chosen to stay." Miroku's dad said confidently. The little boy sniffed, and buried his head in his dad's shoulder. _

_ "Dad...promise you'll never leave me?" Miroku cried, his words muffled. With his head on his dad's shoulder, he didn't see the man glance at his Wind Tunnel. _

_ "I...promise, Miroku. I really promise." His father said. _

* * *

"I hate remembering all this stuff," Miroku mumbled, returning back to his senses. It was depressing to see all those events so clearly, when he had been rid of them for so long.

"I need to get back to Kaede's," Sango said, standing abruptly. Miroku almost fell out of the air, if that had been possible. She had surprised him.

"I can't believe you loved me..." He said, watching her slim figure retreat back into the village. Right now, Miroku would do anything to tell her that he loved her too. _Anything..._

* * *

"Sango!" Kagome cried, upon seeing her friend enter the hut. "Oh Sango, I'm so sorry. I was being horribly nosy, I know. I feel awful..."

Sango sighed. Yes, she was angry with Kagome. But she couldn't stay that way any longer. Kagome was just so... ashamed of herself. It was impossible to stay mad. "Kagome-chan, it's okay." "Are you sure, Sango?" Kagome asked, wide-eyed. Apparently, she had been expecting an argument. InuYasha watched her expectantly.

"It's fine, Kagome." Sango said, in a tone of finality. She sat down on the wooden floor and stared at the doorway to the room where Miroku was. She was not going back in there.

"Okay...if you say so..." Kagome said, shrugging. She wasn't going to press the matter any further. "Well, Kaede said that she'd make something for dinner...if you'd like to eat, Sango-chan."

"I'm not really that hungry." Sango replied. "Thanks for asking."

"Okay...well, InuYasha and I are going to go get some food. I'll tell Kaede to save some for you, just in case you're hungry later."

"Thanks." Sango continued to watch the door, as if any moment Miroku would step through it. She didn't even notice Kagome and InuYasha leaving. She sat this way for five more minutes, then stood and walked into the room. She pulled the white sheet from his face. He was pale, and -she put her hand to his forehead- incredibly cold. __

_ He's a corpse. _A voice in her head said firmly. _Just face it already. He's dead, he's not coming back, and there's no use dwelling on it. _Sango shook her head, dark hair swishing around her face. She wouldn't listen to that voice yet. She was far too stubborn to give up on him now. As she studied the monk's face, a desire slowly formed inside her head.

_No..._The voice argued. _That's so incredibly stupid. Don't do that...what good will it do? _

"Shut up already...." Sango muttered aloud. Great, now she was talking to herself. She was as crazy as Naraku. Almost.

Miroku hovered in the corner, perched in the perfect position to see Sango and himself. His eyes were glazed with depression, and he had half a mind to leave the hut and never come back. He'd have to leave this world eventually, wouldn't he? Wouldn't he? Oh god, this is so stupid.

"There's nothing else for me to do here!" He muttered, glaring down at the floor. "I don't want to sit here and watch Sango feel bad! Is this hell or something?"

Sango gazed longingly at his closed eyes. This was so stupid. He was dead, he wasn't coming back. _Kohaku was dead, though. Wasn't he? And he sure as hell came back. _She thought stubbornly. Slowly, ever so slowly, Sango leaned in closer to the monk's face.

Miroku was scrutinizing her through his transparent eyes. What on earth was she doing? As he watched, she lowered her head and....

Kissed him. Sango had just kissed him. Miroku's eyes widened, and for the second time that day, he felt the illusion of falling through the air. She had kissed him! She, Sango, had kissed him!

Sango sat back up quickly, playing with her hair. She felt so self-conscious, as though someone was watching her.

"I don't believe I did that..." She said, a faint smile playing across her lips. "It's not like I've never wanted to, though..." She laughed, and left the room, shaking her head.

"Oh my..." Miroku said, his face turning a light pink. He frowned, then floated out the door. He was about to follow her, when he stopped. There was no point in stalking her everywhere she went, after all. Somberly, he floated back into the room, then smiled and shook his head.

"Only a girl like Sango would wait until I was dead to kiss me..."


	5. Bring Me to Life

Ch. 5

me: thanks for the reviews! oh...yeah, about the turning colors thing...I guess he technically couldn't, but hey! Lol. Btw, sorry it took me so long to update!! My computer was being evil. Im soooooooooooooooo sorry!!!

Kikyo: ::shifty eyes::

* * *

Sango made her way outside to where her friends sat, eating dinner. Kagome was the first to see her, and she nudged InuYasha to make room for her.

"Sango-chan! I'm so happy you decided to join us!" Kagome smiled, offering Sango a plate of food, which she accepted.

"Yeah...I didn't really want to stay in there." Sango replied, taking a bite of fruit. Kagome nodded knowingly.

"This is pretty hard on you, isn't it Sango?" She whispered.

"Not particularly. It's not like I've never lost anybody before." Sango answered, a cold look possessing her dark eyes. Couldn't they talk about anything other than Miroku?

"Yes, I know...but Miroku was pretty special, wasn't he?" Kagome wore a pitying look, which made Sango want to scream.

"Kagome! Do you think losing Miroku was any harder than watching my own little brother kill countless people? I saw my father die right in front of me, and now you're bugging me just because of Miroku? Dammit Kagome, I don't love him, so just shut up about it!" Sango dropped the plate in the dirt, and retreated back into the house.

"Sango! Wait, I'm sorry! Sango!!" Kagome stood and followed the demon exterminator. InuYasha began to rise, but Kaede motioned for him to sit back down.

"Sango? Sango-chan?" Kagome whispered, slowly opening the door to Miroku's room.

"Leave me alone," Sango sobbed, her long dark hair covering her face. Miroku watched as Kagome put her arm around Sango's thin shoulders, and comforted her.

"This is just terrible..." He murmured. The happiness he had felt about the kiss had evaporated, and now he felt bad for hurting Sango so much.

"I just...I don't want to accept him being gone..." Sango sniffed. "He was trying to save us, and we couldn't save him."

"I know, Sango-chan. I know." Kagome whispered. Miroku sighed, burying his head in his hands. This was like torture, watching Sango like this.

"I'm sorry I was so short with you, Kagome." Sango said quietly, pushing her hair out of her face. .

"It's okay. I was being too nosy, anyways." Kagome smiled uncertainly. "I just, and don't get mad at me again, but I just thought that you two were a couple. You get so angry when he hits on other girls, that I just naturally assumed."

"I got so jealous because...well, because he never asked me to bear his child. He's asked you, and every other girl we've met along the way, but never me." Sango said slowly, as though she had just realized this herself.

"Personally, I think he doesn't want to be shot down. If he asked you, and you said no, which he was pretty certain you would, then that would be hard on him."

"How do you know?"

"I've seen the way he looks at you. I've seen his eyes when you're in trouble. He doesn't look like that for any of the other girls."

"Really?"

"Mm-hm." Kagome answered, smiling. Miroku watched this with interest; Kagome was very perceptive to have noticed that kind of thing.

"Thanks, Kagome. That was really what I needed right now." Sango smiled and stood up. Miroku wanted to hug her, or give her a sign that proved that Kagome was right. He stood in front of the door, blocking the two girls. Kagome passed through him easily, but Sango stopped and stared into his eyes, almost shocking him out of the air. Could she see him??

"Sango-chaaan? What's the matter?" Kagome said, poking her head back into the doorway and right through Miroku, who flinched.

"N-nothing...I just thought....never mind.." Sango said, still staring into his eyes.

"Can...you see me?" Miroku asked uncertainly. Sango shuddered, but did not move from her spot.

"I'll be right out, Kagome." Sango said quietly. Kagome shrugged and left the room.

"Can you see me?" Miroku persisted, waving his hand in front of Sango's face. She flinched and drew her head back. Then, in a trembling voice, she raised her head and stared directly into his eyes again.

"Houshi-sama?"

::How can you see into my eyes

like open doors?

Leading you down into my core

Where I become so numb.

Without a soul

My spirits sleeping somewhere cold.

Until you find it there and lead

it

back

home::

* * *

me: oh yeah, I do NOT own Evanesence!!! and please review! Sry for the short-ness....


	6. My Immortal

Ch. 6

me: Once again, I don't own any Evanesence songs, and I don't own InuYasha!

* * *

I'm so tired of being here.

Suppressed by all my childish fears.

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave.

Because your presence still lingers here

and it won't leave me alone...

* * *

"Is that you, Houshi-sama?" Sango asked, her voice catching. Miroku nodded, but she didn't give any hint that she had seen him. Instead she slowly reached out toward him. He flinched as she stuck her hand right through his face. She seemed to be concentrating hard on something. Eventually, she withdrew her hand and shook her head.

"Wait, Sango!" Miroku yelled, as the demon exterminator made her way out of the hut. She didn't hear him, and he sighed heavily and floated out to follow her.

"Sango! There you are!" Kagome said, happy to see her friend. "Wait...Sango-chan, what's wrong?"

"Kagome... I think I just saw Miroku..." Sango whispered, careful not to let anyone else overhear.

"You mean, underneath the blanket?" Kagome said, confused.

"No! I mean... sort of like a...."

"A ghost?" Kagome suggested. Sango nodded slowly.

"Yes!! A ghost!!" Miroku shouted, floating in front of Sango's face. Once again, she gave no notice she could hear him.

"Sango...you think Miroku's ghost is haunting us?" Kagome said seriously. She didn't want to end up angering her friend again.

" I don't know... I just sort of felt him there for a second, you know? Like he was right there in front of me."

"Wow...maybe he was...you know, in spirit."

Sango sighed. "I doubt it."

"Well, you never know, do you? He could be here with us right now."

"Stop being weird, Kagome." Sango laughed, trying to hide the tears in her eyes.

* * *

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase.

* * *

"I'm not being weird, Sango. I just think that Miroku wouldn't leave without telling you good-bye." Kagome said quietly. Sango stopped laughing.

"What do you mean?" She said, quickly.

"I just think, if there's any way Miroku could come back, he'd take it without a second thought." Kagome answered, looking down. Sango sighed shakily, knowing Kagome was right.

"What are you guys talking about?" InuYasha interrupted, walking over to the two girls. Sango flinched, and InuYasha took a few steps back.

"Geez, what's the matter?" He asked, confused.

"InuYasha, could you get any more insensitive?!" Kagome shrieked. "Miroku is dead, and you ask what the matter is??"

"All I did was ask a question..." The hanyou muttered sulkily. Kagome rolled her eyes and turned back to Sango.

"But Sango, I really do believe that Miroku is here with us now." Kagome said.

* * *

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears

I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have...

All of me...

* * *

"I'm right here!!" Miroku yelled. InuYasha's ears twitched, and he looked up. Miroku floated closer to him, hoping that InuYasha could see him. But the hanyou merely muttered a few words under his breath, and went back to talking to Sango and Kagome. Miroku gave a groan of frustration, and hovered closer to Sango. Gingerly, he touched the back of her neck. He had a great shock when he felt his finger on her skin, not passing through.

-SLAP-

"What...the hell did I do?!" InuYasha yelled, rubbing his face.

"Why were you touching my neck??" Sango shrieked. Kagome's eyes widened, and she quickly took on a look of fury, as well. Miroku watched the scene with great amusement.

"InuYasha! I can't believe you'd hit on Sango!"

"I wasn't hitting on her! I never even touched her!" InuYasha said innocently. Sango rolled her dark eyes and glared at the hanyou.

"Wait...actually, I think he's right." Kagome said. Sango looked up, puzzled.

"How do you mean, Kagome-chan?" She asked.

"He would have to have been directly behind you, otherwise you would have noticed, right?" Kagome asked.

"Actually, that's right." Sango muttered. InuYasha hadn't moved from his spot next to Kagome.

"Feh. Jumping to conclusions, weren't we?" InuYasha muttered, sulking away from the girls. Kagome laughed bitterly, then turned back to Sango.

"Are you sure it wasn't just a bug or something, Sango-chan?" Kagome asked. Sango shook her head.

"No, I'm positive it wasn't. Do you think maybe...."

* * *

You used to captivate me

By your resonating light

But now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts

my once pleasant dreams

Your voice, it chased away

all the sanity in me.

* * *

"I really don't know..." Kagome answered. "Listen, I've got to go help Kaede tidy up. Do you want to come with me?"

"I'll come in a bit." Sango replied. Kagome nodded, and walked away.

"Am I going crazy?" Sango asked herself. It was completely possible; lots of people went crazy after they lost a loved one. But...she had surely felt him there...

"No! Sango, you're not crazy! I'm here!" Miroku yelled. Sango looked up. Her eyes were watering, and she squinted into the setting sun.

"Houshi-sama, if you're really here, give me a sign! Please!" Sango said, a tear dripping from her eye.

"A sign..." Miroku muttered. He reached out to her again, and tried to take her hand. His own passed right through hers, and he sighed. She sighed as well, and stood up, leaving to go help Kagome. Miroku groaned and buried his head in his knees.

"Sango, Kagome's right." He muttered, watching the exterminator join the others. "I'm not going to leave without saying goodbye...I'll stay here until you're gone, if that's what it takes!"

* * *

I've tried to hard to tell myself that you're gone

And though you're still with me

I've been alone all along.

* * *

me: every chapter is going to have new lyrics in it. Be happy!

Kikyo: ::sweatdrop:: what is there to be happy about?

me: ::shows her a picture of kurama::

Kikyo:

me: O.o ::mumbles:: obsessive freak.... PLEASE REVIEW!


	7. When I'm Gone

Ch. 7 When I'm Gone

me: long chapter, for once! have fun, and please Read and Review!!!! oh, and i do NOT own the song by 3 Doors Down: When I'm Gone!

* * *

There's another world inside of me   
That you may never see  
There's secrets in this life  
That I can't hide

* * *

"Hey, Sango-chan? Are you still awake?" Kagome asked, rolling over in her sleeping bag. 

"Yeah. What's wrong?"

"Kaede told me that we're going to have Miroku's funeral tomorrow." Kagome said softly. Sango sighed.

"I just don't like to think of him going into the ground. Once we buried my father, it was like we acknowledged that he was really gone forever."

" I know how you feel... I miss my father, too."

"What happened to him, Kagome-chan? If you don't mind my asking."

"I don't mind. He got hit by a car on the way home from work. I was only three when it happened. I don't remember him much. The only thing I do remember was that he used to come in every night and read to me. The night he died, I remember asking my mom where he was, and why he wasn't home. Then she told me he wasn't coming home."

"Oh, Kagome-chan. I'm so sorry..." Sango said quietly. "I was much older when my father died. I remember Kohaku picking up his weapon and just massacring the village. It was horrible to watch. I wanted to run away, so he couldn't kill me as well, but I stayed. I thought maybe if I talked to him, he'd snap out of it. So much for that, ne?" Sango whispered bitterly. Miroku listened intently to their conversation. He'd never heard Sango talk about her father before.

"It's like Kohaku is still my little brother, the shy one who never really wanted to slay demons." Sango continued. "And he's still here, with me, but I just can't see him. Same with Miroku."

* * *

Somewhere in this darkness  
There's a light that I can't find  
Maybe it's too far away...  
Maybe I'm just blind...

Maybe I'm just blind....

* * *

"What do you mean?" Kagome asked.

"It's like he's still here, I just can't find him. I keep feeling him." Sango replied, staring into the rafters.

"Oh. Well, Sango, you should get some sleep. We're going to have a hard day tomorrow..." Kagome smiled at her friend, then burrowed into her pillow. Sango could tell she was asleep instantly.

"Get some sleep..." The demon slayer moaned, turning in the makeshift bed Kagome had kindly provided. "I can't sleep if I know the man I loved is going into the ground tomorrow..."

"The man...you loved?" Miroku repeated, hovering closer to Sango.

"Well, maybe I didn't love him...maybe I just strongly liked him." She said, apparently talking to herself. Miroku smiled softly and floated even closer to her. He could see every freckle on her face now. He stared at her for a few moments, then sighed.

"You wait 'til I'm dead to admit you love me. You wait 'til I'm dead to kiss me. Why-" Miroku couldn't finish his thought, as he was slammed with another memory.

* * *

_"InuYasha! You slaughtered my village!" A young woman screamed, her long dark hair tied into a ponytail. She wore traditional demon exterminator clothes, and she carried an oversized boomerang. _

_ "Look, I never slaughtered any village!" The half demon roared, his hand drifting casually to his sword. The schoolgirl behind him glanced anxiously at the demon slayer. _

_ "InuYasha, be careful!" The girl whispered, her eyes alight with worry. Miroku stood slightly farther away from the group, looking intently at the exterminator. She was beautiful. _

_ "You're going to pay for what you did!" Sango yelled, just before heaving the boomerang in the hanyou's direction. He dodged the weapon just in time, and then drew out his lethal sword. _

_ "I didn't want to have to fight you," He growled, raising the Tetsusaiga. "But apparently, you give me no choice!"_

_ "InuYasha..." Miroku said quietly. _

_ "What!!" _

_ "Don't hurt her. She must be under some sort of illusion." The monk said, glancing at the woman._

_ "She's trying to kill me!" InuYasha yelled. "Miroku, she could hurt you or Kagome any mi-" His words were cut off as the slayer dealt another crushing blow with her weapon. _

_ "Exactly my point, Miroku..." InuYasha muttered, panting heavily. "We've got to finish her off before she finishes us! Now stop thinking those perverted thoughts, and help!"_

_ "She's so beautiful..." Miroku said, gazing at her. She stopped for a fraction of a second, and raised her tragic eyes to meet his. He stared at her for a moment, then she looked away, as though embarrassed to have lost her concentration. A rosy blush covered her face, as she swung the boomerang at InuYasha again, who was barely quick enough to dodge it. _

_ "Miroku! A little help here!" He yelled impatiently. The houshi hurried to his comrade, but he knew that he would never do anything to hurt that woman, no matter what she did. _

_ At that moment, he had fallen in love. _

* * *

So hold me when I'm here  
Right me when I'm wrong  
Hold me when I'm scared  
And love me when I'm gone  
Everything I am  
And everything in me  
Wants to be the one  
You wanted me to be

* * *

"Ah, I remember that." Miroku said quietly. He looked down at the slayer, who, despite her best efforts, had fallen into a deep sleep. He watched her, then strode over to the corner he had spent most of the day in. Just as he was about to fall asleep, he felt another memory stride into his head.

* * *

_"So, Naraku had control of your brother?" Miroku asked, his eyes dark with sorrow. Sango nodded quickly. _

_ "Yes. This Naraku demon commanded my younger brother, Kohaku, to kill his own father and comrades. It was a bloodbath, horrible to watch. I did everything in my power, but I couldn't save him..." She said, her eyes watering._

_ "It wasn't your fault, Sango." Miroku replied, moving slightly closer to her. She glanced at him, then looked back down at her hands. _

_ "I let everyone in that village down...my father, my brother, and all of our friends. Now they're dead, and never coming back." _

_ "We'll help you. All of us have been cheated by Naraku at one time or another. Now we're going on this journey to avenge ourselves. You could join us, if you'd like..."_

_ "I...thank you for your offer, but I think it would be better if I traveled alone."_

_ "Aw, come on!" InuYasha groaned, earning surprised looks from the rest of the group. "You're pretty strong, and we could use more strength against Naraku."_

_ "Well....when you put it that way..." Sango smiled. "I suppose I'll travel with you for a while. Actually I-"_

_ -SLAP-_

_ "What was that?!" Sango shrieked, inching away from the monk. He smiled secretly, then leaned back against the rock, rubbing the slap mark. Kagome and InuYasha rolled their eyes in unison. Sango turned away from him, so he wouldn't see the secret smile that decorated her face. _

* * *

I'd never let you down  
Even if I could  
I'd give up everything  
If only for your good  
So hold me when I'm here  
Love me when I'm wrong  
You can hold me when I'm scared  
But you won't always be there  
So love me when I'm gone...

* * *

__

"Heh, I remember that too..." Miroku smiled. He settled into the dark corner, watching over his friends. InuYasha was talking in his sleep again, and Kagome woke briefly because she was cold. Eventually, Miroku drifted off to sleep.

"InuYasha...you won't mind helping me move the body, will you?" The sun shone in through the crack in the ceiling, and Miroku awoke to the sound of Kaede's voice. He blinked twice, then watched his own body being carried through the door, by Kaede and InuYasha. Sango and Kagome were still asleep, but Sango was stirring.

"Mmm...Kagome-chan, are you awake?" Sango yawned, poking her friend.

"No..." Kagome moaned, burying her head further in the pillow. Sango smiled softly, then walked over to the door. She peered outside, and observed InuYasha and Kaede digging a very deep hole in the soft dirt by the forest.

"What are they doing?" She wondered. Then it hit her. They were digging Miroku's grave. __

The funeral was today.

* * *

__

When your education x-ray   
Cannot see under my skin  
I won't tell you a damn thing   
That I could not tell my friends  
Now roaming through this darkness  
I'm alive but I'm alone  
Part of me is fighting this  
But part of me is gone.

So hold me when I'm here  
Right me when I'm wrong  
Hold me when I'm scared  
And love me when I'm gone

Love me when I'm gone...


	8. Iris

Ch. 8: Iris

me: ::rolls eyes:: I DON'T OWN THE GOO GOO DOLLS, OR THEIR SONG IRIS! NOW GET AWAY FROM ME BEFORE I SIC KIKYO-CHAN ON YOU!

Kikyo: ::plays with pointy objects:: you called?

me: Oo...please read and review....oh, and VERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT! I made this chapter extra long, because I'm not going to be able to update until Friday, August 13th. Please still review this chapter, cause I need to know how it was! Please review!!!

* * *

And I'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now

* * *

"Kagome-chan! Hurry up! The service starts in ten minutes, and we can't be late!" Sango yelled, poking her head through the door of the hut.

"I'm coming!" Kagome answered. Sango straightened the white tie on her ponytail and crossed her arms. Seconds later, Kagome emerged from the hut, dressed in a clean school uniform.

"Okay, I'm ready." Kagome announced, looking for InuYasha and Kaede.

"They're by the well....you know, that little space between those three trees? Down in the forest? That's where they're..." Sango's voice cracked and she looked away. Kagome patted her arm, and began walking toward the forest.

"Hey, is Shippo-chan coming to the funeral?" Kagome asked, apparently trying to get Sango's mind away from the idea of Miroku going into the ground.

"Yes, I think so. He's with Kaede right now, though."

"Oh." Kagome stared at the ground as she walked. She had run out of things to say. They were almost to the three trees, when Sango stopped.

"Kagome-chan...go on without me...I think I'd like to pick a flower for....you know..." Sango faltered, looking at her friend.

"No problem, Sango-chan!" Kagome said, smiling encouragingly. She hurried off to join InuYasha, who looked confused, and Kaede and Shippo, who both looked tired.

"What kind of flower should I pick...?" Sango asked herself, biting her lip. There were so many colors; she couldn't pick the wrong one.

"I'd be happy with whichever one, Sango..." Miroku said quietly. He had been following her and Kagome ever since they had left Kaede's hut.

"It has to be just perfect..." Sango muttered.

"No, it doesn't!" Miroku said, laughing. "Sango, you-"

* * *

_"Hey Sango..." Miroku took the place next to her on the large gray rock she had been sitting on most of the evening._

_"What?" Sango asked, her eyes still glued to the starry sky. _

_"I'm sorry you had to see your brother that way..." He replied, putting his hand on her own. She flinched, but made no move to stop him. _

_"He would have killed Kagome, if InuYasha hadn't been there to stop him..." She choked, her voice thick. _

_"It's not him, it's Naraku. Granted, I don't know Kohaku, but he seems like a very nice brother to have." Miroku said, smiling. Sango grinned in spite of herself. _

_"Yeah...he really was.." She answered. "On clear nights like these, we used to sit on the roof and look up at the stars. Kohaku used to make up silly names for them that would make me laugh. It was just the two of us."_

_"That sounds nice. I never had that kind of thing going with my family. My mother died two minutes after she gave birth to me, and my father was sucked into his wind tunnel when I was young. I had to spend most of my teenage years with a roaring drunk, and a racoon." _

_Sango laughed, then stopped, looking horrified. "Oh... I wasn't laughing at your parents, Houshi-sama."_

_"Don't worry. I didn't think you were. Anyways, I came here to give you this." He held out a dark red flower. "When I saw this, I thought of you. The outside is dark red, and tough, but if you look inside..." He gently opened the flower for Sango to see. "The inside is a light pink. I really like this flower, Sango...it reminds me of you." _

_"Oh..." Sango took the flower and smiled at it. "Houshi-sama, thank you so much!"_

_"Anytime!" Miroku grinned, striding away. Sango continued to look at the flower, her eyes shining with happiness. The happiness she hadn't felt since her father died. _

* * *

And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life  
'Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight

* * *

"Oh...I had almost forgotten about that!" Sango said softly. She sighed, and looked to the ground. "It's weird... I keep getting these odd flashes...it's like they're Houshi-sama's memories... his father dying...the first time I met him..."

"What?!" Miroku exclaimed, his eyes like plates. Sango had been getting the memories too??

"I need to find one of those flowers..." She muttered, searching the many patches of multicolored shrubs. Tears sprang to her eyes as she came across a few of the yellow flowers that had decorated her father's grave. Miroku searched as well, but found nothing.

"There has to be at least one of those flowers around here somewhere!" Sango said desperately. After ten minutes of searching, she sadly gave up. Miroku watched her silently.

"I can't believe I failed him again..." She said, the tears in her eyes more pronounced then ever.

"You didn't fail me, Sango! I don't care if you decorate my grave with weeds! Just the fact that you cared enough to be there...."

"I better get back to Kagome..." Sango murmured, standing. As a last resort, she picked a pretty white flower. Miroku followed her as she rushed to the three trees, where her friends were waiting impatiently.

"Geez, Sango! Didja get lost on your way over here or something?" InuYasha asked. Kagome glared at him.

"InuYasha...Sit!"

The hanyou was slammed into the soft ground. "What the hell was that for?"

"For being so insensitive! Can't you see that Sango's upset??" Kagome shrieked. InuYasha shot an angry look her way, then stood and took his former place by Kaede.

"We should not be so disrespectful. We are, of course, in the presence of the dead." Kaede said quietly. Sango felt her eyes fill with tears again.

* * *

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

* * *

Kaede began talking about how Miroku was a good man. Sango zoned it all out; she didn't like to hear how Miroku _was _a good man.

"He still is..." She muttered, glaring at Kaede.

"Now, Kagome...you wanted to say a few things about him?" Kaede asked, turning to the young miko.

"Ah...yes. Um, in my era, during funerals, sometimes the people that were close to the deceased person say a few nice-" She glared at InuYasha "things about them. Um...so..."

"Can I go, Kagome?" Shippo implored, staring up into her eyes. She smiled and nodded. Shippo took his place by the covered body, looking very important.

"You're letting the fox set an example for the rest of us?" InuYasha asked. Kagome glared at him some more.

"Go on, Shippo-chan.." Sango said, ignoring InuYasha and Kagome. She wanted to hear what he had to say.

"Okay! Miroku was a really nice guy. He used to protect me from InuYasha sometimes, and he was also really strong! I'm sorry that he's gone now..." Shippo's voice cracked. "I'm going to miss him a lot." The little kitsune walked unsteadily back to Kagome, who took him up in her arms.

"I'll go." InuYasha decided. Miroku watched him with amusement.

"He'd better not be rude!" Kagome whispered angrily.

"Uh...Miroku was nice. Kinda perverted, but okay all the same. He was a very strong fighter, and a good person to have on our side. Um...I'll miss him, I guess? Oh, and also, I'd like to thank him for fighting so well in his last battle-"

* * *

_Battle...battle...its coming back to me...._

_"Houshi-sama! Get out of the hut now!" Sango screamed, hurling her boomerang at the red-eyed Kagura, who blocked with a gigantic wave of wind. The wave crashed into the hut, smashing it to pieces. Kagura's eyes gleamed with excitement. _

_"Dance of the Dragon!" Her powerful attack shot out at Sango, who deflected it fairly easily with her boomerang. _

_"Kagura! What are you doing here??" InuYasha roared, his eyes blazing. He lifted his sword and sent the Wind Scar streaming toward the youkai. She laughed and took control of his wind, immobilizing it. _

_"Haven't you learned, InuYasha?" She smiled. She was about to send another wave toward the hanyou, when she felt a heavy object crash into her back. Kagura's eyes glazed, and she whipped around, angry. The young demon slayer stood defiantly, raising a delicate hand to catch the boomerang. _

_"You'll pay for that!" Kagura shrieked. She flipped open her fan, but before she could attack, she saw the monk reach for his Kazaana. _

* * *

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming  
Or the moment of truth in your lies  
When everything feels like the movies  
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

* * *

_"Miroku, no!" Kagome screamed. She was still searching for her purifying arrows, amidst the wreckage that was once the hut. They were the only way to take care of Kagura. _

_"You mortals forget so easily!" Kagura laughed, her voice filled with mirth. "Open that Air Rip, and the wasps will easily consume your body! Better to let me do my work, ne?" She aimed her fan at Sango again, who held her boomerang ready. _

_"Dance of the Dragon!" Kagura sent the powerful waves straight for Sango, who held up her boomerang as a block. _

_"Sango, the waves are too powerful!" InuYasha yelled. "Run, you idiot!" _

_"Sango!!!!"_

* * *

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

* * *

_Miroku tore the cloth from his hand, diverting the sharp blades of air away from Sango. Kagura scowled and unleashed the poisonous wasps. These wasps were a slightly different shade. They appeared deadlier and they were heading straight towards him. He pathetically attempted to close the tunnel, but the wasps were already being consumed. He winced, and fell to __his knees, shaking. _

_"Houshi-sama!" Sango screamed, her voice shaking. She resisted the strong urge to drop everything and rush to Miroku's side. This was a battle after all..._

_"You'll pay for that one, Kagura!" InuYasha yelled. Kagome picked up an arrow. It was chipped and bent, but it would do. She fit it into the bow and aimed. _

* * *

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

* * *

_"Hit the mark..." Kagome muttered to herself, aiming directly for Kagura, who was using all her energy to deflect the Wind Scar. The miko let the arrow fly. As usual, it was quite a bit off target, but it still separated the wind, as it was meant to. _

_"Damn!" Kagura murmured. InuYasha raised his sword one last time, but she, sensing defeat, conjured her usual retreat: the large white feather. _

_"Coward!" InuYasha yelled after her, watching the feather drift slowly away. She did not look back. _

_"Houshi-sama!!" Sango screamed again, abandoning her weapon and rushing to her injured friend's side. _

* * *

And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

* * *

_"God Miroku...please be all right..." Sango took his hand. Kagome watched the two sadly, while InuYasha looked on. _

_"Why are you two just standing there?" Sango yelled, startling the two. "We've got to get __him to Kaede's, now! Hurry!" She was frantic; the monk seemed to be dying in front of them. _

_"Please Miroku...hold on..."_

I just want you to know who I am_..._

_"I need you...you can't die..." The thoughts in her head swirled around; she felt sick to her stomach. _

I just want you to know who I am_...___

_"I can't...no I won't...let another special person in my life die....again...I love him...I need to be with him...I've got to tell him now..."_

I just want you to know who I am_..._


	9. Taking Over Me

Ch. 9: Taking Over Me

me: ::anger mark:: I...do...not...own...Evanesence....or...their...songs.....

Kikyo: O.o

me: so please review!

* * *

You don't remember me

But I remember you

I lie awake and try

so hard

not to think of you.

But who can decide what they dream?

And dream I do....

* * *

_"I didn't need to see that again..." _Sango thought, her eyes shining softly. _"I would have given anything to save him, but he died just because I was too stubborn to move out of the way. If I had just listened to InuYasha, then Miroku would be by my side instead of underneath that sheet...I can't believe the things I do sometimes..."_

__"Sango-chan? Would you like to say something to Miroku as well?" Kagome asked. Sango snapped out of her reverie, blinking away the tears that threatened to pour down her face.

"You can go before me, Kagome-chan..."

"But...I just went...we've all had a chance except you. I mean, I can understand if you don't want to, but-"

"I want to. I...I'd just like to do it alone, if that's all right?" Sango looked around at the rest of the group, all who seemed to agree to this.

"Sango, when you're done, please come and fetch us. We still need to bury him." Kaede said quietly.

"Yes, Kaede-sama."

InuYasha left the clearing first, apparently eager to get away from his departed comrade. Shippo clambered onto Kaede's shoulder and left with her. Kagome was the last to leave; she walked quickly toward the hut, then turned on her heel and stared at Sango.

"Ah...Sango-chan..?"

"Hm?"

"Please don't feel like it was your fault. Miroku didn't die because of you; he died _for _you. There's a big difference there." Kagome's eyes were shining as well, and she wiped them on her white sleeve before continuing. "He loved you so much that he sacrificed his life for you. So just...don't feel bad, please..."

"I don't feel bad, Kagome-chan." Sango lied, gritting her teeth. Heh, 'died for her.' What a lie. He died _because _she had been stupid enough to think that a piece of wood was going to be indestructible against dozens of incredibly sharp objects.

"Oh...well, I just thought I'd give you my views on it..."

"Okay, fine. Now could you please go?"

* * *

I believe in you

I'd give up anything just to find you

I have to be with you

To live

To breathe

You're taking over me...

* * *

"Sorry!" Kagome hurried to catch up to the others. Sango watched her friend's brown shoes slap onto the dirt. Miroku would never walk again. Slowly, very slowly, Sango lifted the white flower from her pouch.

"Um, earlier today I remembered that time you told me how I was like that flower. It really meant a lot to me to hear that from you...I..." Her voice caught, and she continued, shakily. "When I was a demon slayer, people always told me not to let my emotions get in the way of my work, and I listened to them. Um, but you...um, I think you brought out the best in me...god, this sounds stupid...but yeah."

"It's not stupid, Sango.." He whispered, his eyes filling with transparent tears. He couldn't keep watching her feel like this.

"And...um, I'll miss you of course, and I hope you're okay, wherever you are. Um, we'll get our revenge on Naraku for you, and I won't forget you." She let the tears fall onto the white sheet that covered the monk, and she placed the flower next to his heart. Still crying, she looked up, her eyes searching for the place they were going to bury him. She found the dark hole in the middle of the three trees, and she looked inside. Miroku followed suit, and the two gasped simultaneously at what they saw.

_The flower..._

__"Oh god..." Sango reached her hand into the soft dirt and cupped the flower, feeling the velvet-like petals. She lifted it from the grave and held it in her hands.

"The flower..." Miroku let a tear fall, and to his surprise, it landed on the dirt, forming a dark brown wet spot. He gasped, taken aback.

"What the-?" Sango wiped her eyes on her sleeve and examined the dirt, placing her finger on the spot.

"Sango!!"Miroku yelled, half hoping she could hear him. It had never worked before, ne?

"Damn it Miroku, if you're here, could you just come out and tell me?!" She sighed, exasperated.

"I've been trying to!" He yelled back.

"Give me a damn sign!"

"I'm TRYING!" He reached over to her and grabbed at her hand. His own went straight through it, and he sighed.

"Houshi-sama...talk to me, if you're here..." Sango said quietly, her voice no longer angry. He reached for her hand again, but this time touched the flower.

* * *

Have you forgotten all I know

and all we had?

You saw me mourning my love for you

and you touched my hand...

I knew you loved me then.

* * *

His pale finger rested on the dark flower, not passing through it. Miroku's eyes lit up and he stared into her eyes, smiling softly.

...but she just looked right through him.

"Damn..." He withdrew his hand and stared at her. She stared back, her eyes dry now. Sango stood, placing the flower back into the grave. She raised her head toward the sky and looked up at the white clouds. It was a fine day for a memorial service, and he deserved it. Her eyes remained dry as she walked over to the white sheet and lifted it. She stared at him, then smiled.

"I love you, Houshi-sama."

* * *

I believe in you

I'll give up everything just to find you

I have to be with you

To live

To breathe

You're taking over me.

* * *

"Houshi-sama?" The voice was female, and very annoyed. "Houshi-sama, get your lazy ass up or I'll hit you. Come on! InuYasha and Kagome are outside already!"

* * *

I look in the mirror

And see your face

If I look deep enough

So many things that are just like you

are taking over....

* * *

"Wake up already!!" Miroku heard the impatient voice one more time before he felt a sharp pain in his head and awoke with a start.


	10. My Last Breath

Ch. 10: My Last Breath

me: hello! I'm back! Kikyo-chan is too! ::pulls her hair::

Kikyo: fehhh...

me: This is the last chapter, there will be no epilogue. Thank you all so much for your kind reviews! anime flood tears

Kikyo: ::hands her a hanky::

me: ::sniff:: thank you. Why are you being so nice?

Kikyo: 'cause this damn story is finally over, and we don't have to listen to Miroku fangirls!!

me: oh shut up. You're a Miroku fangirl yourself!!

Kikyo: shut.....up....

me: review, please! this is the very last chapter!!

* * *

Hold on to me, love

You know I can't stay long

All I wanted was to say I love you

And that I'm not afraid

Can you hear me?

Can you feel me in your arms?

* * *

"Honestly, Houshi-sama. You could sleep through a tornado!" Sango muttered. The monk sat up, confused, rubbing his head.

"What did you hit me with?"

Sango inclined her head toward her boomerang, which was resting on the floor, about three feet from her reach.

"I wondered why that hurt so much..." Miroku mumbled, standing up and dusting his violet robes.

"Well, you wouldn't wake up..." Sango said, smiling. He returned the smile; after what he had just seen, he would have done anything for her.

"Anyways, InuYasha and Kagome are waiting outside, and we're going to keep traveling to Kaede's; InuYasha is getting pretty impatient, and Kagome's had to stop him from coming in here and pounding your head in."

"You did a pretty good job of pounding my head in yourself..."

"Oh shut up..." She laughed and brushed a piece of dark hair back behind her ear. "Come on, let's go already."

Miroku nodded and followed her outside, still sweating from his vivid dream. Something seemed to be bothering Sango, and she spun around to face him, her eyes intense.

"Look, this has been bothering me...what you said last night, about how I could say something nice to you? Well, okay, look. I hope you had sweet dreams, okay??" With that, she spun on her heel and marched over to InuYasha and Kagome. Miroku smiled and followed her.

* * *

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

Are all my thoughts of you

sweet raptured light?

It ends here

tonight.

* * *

"Took you long enough, Miroku!" InuYasha yelled. Kagome rolled her eyes. She shrugged at Miroku.

"The important thing is that he's here, InuYasha..." Kagome said airily. "Can we go now?"

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" A strange voice spoke from somewhere above them. Miroku turned cold. He knew that voice...this couldn't be happening.

"I thought it might be you...Kagura!" InuYasha snarled, and Miroku knew he was right. The wind youkai sneered and sent a massive wave toward the hut.

"Houshi-sama, get away from that hut now!" Sango screamed, getting ready for battle. Miroku obeyed, dodging out of the way as the lethal wind slammed into the place.

_It was the future...someway, somehow I saw the future. I'm going to die unless I change it. But how can I change it? When it comes down to it, it's either mine or Sango's life..._

__And that was an easy decision.

* * *

I'll miss the winter

A world of fragile things

Look for me in the white forest

Hiding in a hollow tree

Come find me

I know you hear me

I can taste it in your tears

* * *

"Dance of the Dragon!" The attack flew toward Sango, who deflected it with her boomerang, her eyes afire.

"You're going to have to do better than that, Kagura!" InuYasha yelled, unsheathing his sword and sending the Wind Scar toward her.

"Haven't you learned, InuYasha?" She laughed and took control of his wind, immobolizing it. She prepared to send another wave toward the hanyou, when she felt a heavy object crash into her back. She whipped around, only to see the demon slayer, boldly raising a delicate hand to catch the Hiraikotsu.

"You'll pay for that!" Kagura shrieked. She flicked open her fan and was about to get rid of the girl for good, but out of the corner of her eye....

Miroku held up his Kazaana, his eyes blazing. He would die for his love, yes he would. It would hurt her, and he hated that, but she needed to live her life. She had already lost so much of it.

* * *

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

Are all my thoughts of you

Sweet raptured light?

It ends here

tonight.

* * *

"Miroku, don't!" Kagome screamed. She was on her knees searching for the sacred arrows. They were the only thing that would stand a chance against Kagura. Her blue-black hair whipped around her face, hiding the terrified look that she wore.

"You mortals forget so easily! Open the Air Rip and the wasps will consume you easily! Better to let me do my work, ne?" She laughed, and pushed the dark brown hair out of her eyes so she could see more clearly.

"Dance of the Dragon!" The blades flew toward Sango, who held her boomerang steady. Miroku didn't think twice; he opened the Kazaana and the blades smashed into the trees, a good four feet away from Sango.

"Fool!" Kagura screamed, clearly miffed about missing her target. She sent the wasps toward Miroku, who once again attempted to close the tunnel. But they were too quick, and there was nothing he could do.

"Houshi-sama!!!"

* * *

Closing your eyes to disappear

You pray your dreams will leave you here

But still you wake and know the truth

No one's here...

* * *

He fell to his knees, wincing. Kagome screamed.

"You'll pay for that one, Kagura!" InuYasha roared, his golden eyes ablaze. Sango dropped her boomerang and rushed to his side.

"Houshi-sama...please...are you okay?"

"I don't think so, Sango..." He said quietly. She choked back her tears, and quickly assumed an angry expression.

"You idiot! I would have been fine! I would have been fine..." She sobbed, holding onto his hand.

"No you wouldn't have..." Miroku argued.

"Well, you didn't have to do that, Houshi-sama...you didn't have to save me..."

"I wanted to. I love you, Sango." There was no point in keeping it from her now. He was going to die, and she might as well know.

She stared up at him, her eyes shining. "I love you too. I've wanted to tell you forever...I'm in love with you, Houshi-sama."

He smiled, trying not to wince with pain. She kissed his cheek and studied him.

"Do you think...you're going to...um..." She stopped, not wanting to say the next word.

"Die? Do I think I'm going to die? Sango, I know I'm going to die." He said sadly. "But if you had died here, today, then there would have been no reason left for me to live. Either way, I was meant to die today..." He laughed bitterly.

"Then, what is my reason to live, Houshi-sama?" She asked him angrily. "Why am I so much more important than you?"

"You need to find and free Kohaku...you need to grow older, and marry, and have children."

"I couldn't love anyone else!" She said incredulously. Was this some sort of stupid test?

"You will in time...love someone and be happy. For me?" Miroku requested, smiling. She glared at him. He was going to die, and he was sitting here, smiling like a fool.

"So, you want me to forget about you?" Sango asked stubbornly. He shook his head.

"No! I want you to always remember me, but I don't want to stop you from living your life, Sango." He answered, still smiling.

"Will...will you remember me?" She asked, faltering. He smiled. It was the same smile that had won her over many months ago.

"I'll never forget. Never." His head was swimming now. The wasps were taking a much quicker effect then he had envisioned. White lights swirled around in his head. Sango seemed to notice, and she touched his forehead. He laughed softly.

"I'll see you on the other side, Sango..." He murmured. "Someday..."

And as he breathed his last breath, he could hear her. Quietly, almost silent, he heard her utter her last words to him.

"Goodnight, Houshi-sama. Sweet dreams."

* * *

Say goodnight

Don't be afraid

Calling me

Calling me

As you fade

To black...

* * *

me: and so ends my first Mir/San fic! Hope ya liked! Please review!! My next fic, Shock Therapy, will be out soon!

Kikyo: its finally over! ::sings random songs and dances::

me: ah, btw, there will be NO epilogue! sorry!


End file.
